A thank you note is an expression of appreciation for a thoughtful act, expression, or gift. But the potential formality of this thought can be intimidating. Many people think that the wording has to be perfect, and this causes so much anxiety that the notes are never sent. Before all the other rules, just remember that an imperfect note that comes with heartfelt sentiment is better than a perfect note that was never written. In order to relieve some of the anxiety on this subject, here is a simple guide to the do's and don'ts of thank you notes. You may discover that in some cases where you thought a written note was required, it's not. The Do's of Thank You Notes Send your thank you notes as quickly as possible. You should personally hand write any thank you notes. Do not buy pre-printed thank you cards or send an email to thank someone who gave you a gift. Emails lack a personal touch and pre-printed thank you cards give the gift giver the impression that you don't have time to personally thank them for their gift. Always make specific reference to the gift that is the subject of the note, such as "Thank you so much for the blue sweater. How did you know that was my favorite color?" Always send notes in the following situations:

• Wedding gifts.
• For sympathy letters, flowers, or mass cards.
• To the hostess after a party that was hosted in your honor.
• For bridal or baby shower gifts.
• For gifts that were received by mail.
• After being entertained by your boss.
• Gifts received during a hospital stay.
• After being hosted as a houseguest for one or more nights (unless it's a close relative or friend who is doing the hosting).
• For notes or gifts of congratulations.

Thank you notes are not required in the following situations, but would still be a nice gesture:

• After being a guest at a dinner party.
• After a job interview (not required, but definitely a smart idea).
• For birthday gifts that were received and opened in person, and you already thanked the giver personally.
• When a friend has helped you out with a special favor such as babysitting, a meal when you were sick, running errands for you when you are incapable.
• To the sales representative who has entertained you personally as part of a business relationship.

Even though most thank you notes can be sent on informal stationery, that doesn't mean it's okay to use a piece of paper from your shopping list pad. Find note cards that reflect your personality, and keep a ready supply on hand. They don't need to cost a lot of money. A wide selection of personalized thank you notes for every occasion, such as those featured below, can be found on our website – www.thefinishedtouchsd.com. Excerpts from The Do's and Don'ts of Thank You Notes by Donna Pilato and Tinyprints [gallery columns="2"]